Stay QURIOUS..

In all my years, working with people and teams on personal development and growth, the one common theme I hear is: “I am not certain what is expected of me or what I expect from myself (…)”.

Trying too hard to achieve this, call it happiness – by attending workshops, reading self-help books, taking meditation classes, installing mindfulness apps – often stresses us out more than it fulfills what we are looking for. What we should do instead is actually quite simple, however in today’s ‘always busy, always-on’ culture, hard to come by. This is connecting with your boss, your co-worker, your life partner on a deeper level rather than the day-to day superficial level. Study after study shows that good social relationships are the strongest, most consistent predictor of a happy life. The best instrument to achieve this is a really good conversation in which both parties are truly listening to each other with open hearts and minds.

Often we miss the opportunity in these conversations to express our appreciation, what we value and what we expect from each other. In my work I am using these three questions, or conversation starters:

• You inspire me to…
• What I like to see more of…
• What I would like to learn from you…

We’re all hungry for affirmation. The human need for feedback on what’s expected, if doing what we’re doing makes sense, receiving advice, course direction or simply a confirmation of appreciation is super valuable. When I facilitate this with groups of people who have been working together for years and ask them to have this 3 question conversation with each other; I have a hard time breaking up their talk as they share things with each other never done before.

Here you go, try it sometime with someone you work with, your boss or..how long has it been you looked your loved one in the eye to answer these questions for each other?

Did you think this was about your personal goal? That would be not so healthy right? Well, is it healthy to see so many companies and brands coming out to say that their footprint, their output, production, revenue, number of hotels, etc. will be doubled by the year 2020? What is it with all these bold statements like: “Our strategy is to double in size by the year 2020”.

STRATEGIC GOALS
This copy/paste strategy chasing the competition is driven by the conglomeratisation (I think I just made up this word..) within industries like airlines, fashion, car and hotel brands. It’s interesting that these large companies are buying and creating brands so frequently that the customer has a hard time catching up. Marriott today has over 35 brands, Wyndham and Accor are closely following. No wonder the customer is confused and the likes of Booking.com are successful.

I understand the need for these multi-brand companies to grow and grow. They need to catch the eyeballs of the online consumer, deliver new brands to investors, build huge loyalty databases…however it starts to look very much like ‘dog eat dog’ out there. Is the winner the largest and boldest in the end? I wonder.

CUSTOMER FIRST..?
A strategic goal should always be hard to copy, be unique and needs to stand out. Otherwise it’s just another tactical goal. Many brands have great slogans, but what do they really mean? Just a few: “To create a better life for the people”, “To inspire humanity – both in the air and on the ground”, “We work hard every day to make […] the world’s most successful service brand”.

I get it, these are interesting slogans for marketing and to rally the troops. Yet I challenge brands to go out and publish equally bold statements in their strategic goals which include customer-centric targets. I just made up a few:

“Our strategy is to have the industry’s best customer satisfaction scores by 2020” or..
“Our strategy is to have zero wait time at our customer service centres by 2020” or..
“Our strategy is to have every guest recommend to their friends to stay in our hotels by 2020”.

HARD
Yes, this is indeed harder to do. It also includes a public promise to customers, guests. Maybe I am unrealistic. But think about it, today’s and especially tomorrow’s customer is looking for something different in a sea of sameness, in a forrest of different brands. I’d love to hear from you.

What are you doing to stand out…?

First month of the year in the pocket. If you have set yourself some new personal goals for the year…are you on track? Most resolutions are thrown out of the window around this time because they are too ambitious, too many, too big, too vague, etc. I am a firm believer of starting small and achieving things every single day. Yes, I love ticking off those to-do’s at the end of the day. Happiness!

In this note I am sharing with you a wonderful collection of simple life goals I came across recently and I hope that at least a few of these will inspire you as well:

Life’s Little Instructions

Treat everyone you meet like you want to be treated * Watch a sunrise at least once a year * Never refuse homemade brownies * Plant a tree on your birthday * Learn three clean jokes * Return borrowed vehicles with the gas tank full * Compliment three people everyday * Sing in the shower * Keep it simple * Never waste an opportunity to tell someone you love them * Leave everything a little better than you found it * Think big thoughts but relish in small pleasures * Become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know * Ask for a raise when you feel like you’ve earned it * Be forgiving of yourself and others * Overtip good waiters * Buy whatever kids are selling on tables in their front yards * Wear polished shoes * Avoid negative people * Remember friend’s birthdays * Commit yourself to constant improvement * Send lots of Valentine cards. Sign them, ‘Someone who thinks you’re really wonderful’ * Stop blaming others and take responsibility for every area of your life * Look people in the eye * Strive for excellence not perfection * Be the first to say ‘Hello’ * Have a dog * Stretch your body every morning * Wave at school kids on buses * Be there when people need you * Don’t expect life to be fair * Never underestimate the power of love * Drink champagne for no reason at all * Live your life as an exclamation not an explanation * Don’t be afraid to say ‘I made a mistake’ * Always keep your promises * Marry only for love * Rekindle old friendships * Run if you don’t like walking * Walk if you don’t like running * Cherish your mother *

My read suggestion:
Let’s go back to basic 2018 goal setting: did you even pick the right resolution? Have a read though this article by Jen A. Miller in the guide to setting and keeping resolutions, you want to pick something that your heart is in, rather than something you set arbitrarily or when emotions are high.